A special moment: Running for the Diploma!A few days ago my friend Mary, from Mary's Tea Cottage posted about her concerns as a mother of a daughter with special needs and a wife of a husband with failing sight. Her thoughts touched me deeply as they closely relate to my own feelings. You can read her post here.
I've met many wonderful women through blogging and several of them have children with special needs as I do. A few also have husbands with health issues making the stress of being a caretaker that much greater. I found their blogs to be places filled with inspiration, not from the "misery loves company" viewpoint, but from the "wow, look how positive she is" viewpoint. These are not blogs focused on the issues of special needs or care taking. They are just everyday blogs like yours and mine, a little home life, some decorating, crafting and shopping, the stuff we all enjoy reading.
Along with Mary, you might enjoy visiting these special mothers:
Betsy at My Five Men - Betsy has five men in her family, including triplets with autism.
Lucy at English Cottage in Georgia (and her new blog Life is Too Short) -Lucy has a daughter with Myotonic Muscular Dystrophy and her husband suffered a traumatic brain injury.
Sue at It's a Very Cherry World - Sue has two daughters with Asperger's Syndrome.
These are just a few of the special mothers I've come across while blogging. There are many more. I'd like to share the following story for all of you who have been "chosen" to be mother's of children with special needs. I received it many years ago as part of a email group, I wish it had an author's name to give credit. Many of you may have seen it before, but it never hurts to remind ourselves how we are blessed.
"Choosing Special Mothers"
Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen? I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger. "Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew. Forrest, Majorie, daughter, Patron Saint, Cecilia. Rudledge, Carrie, twins, Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
The next name he passes to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious, " Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly", God says, "could I hand a handicapped child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But has she patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have to much patience or she will drown in a sea of self pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so important in any mother but especially a mother of a handicapped child. You see, the child I'm going to give her has his own world. She has to make him live in her world and that's not going to be easy."
"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness, is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says "Momma" for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it. When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child she will see it as few people ever see my creations. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice...and allow her to rise above these. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is by my side."
"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in midair.
God smiled. "A mirror will suffice."
